The Happy Path

Recently I had to just have a good ole' cry about our whole 'baby making' & adoption situation. I feel better now I think but I had a hard few days.What helped me get out of my funk was remembering how I met my husband. It sounds strange but I had to go through quite a bit in my life before I met him. I was able to see that my journey prepared me to meet him and to be the wife I am today.

Essentially. I was married in my early 20's to Mr Wrong. I thought I knew what love and marriage was all about but I really, seriously didn't. However, through that experience I learned what I wanted to be as a wife and what I wanted in relationships. Once we got divorced, I moved to California and met Jonny. It took us nearly 4 years and a tremendous break up in the middle but eventually we got married. It was the best decision of my life. I can truly say that this person is my best friend, I am a co-captain of our little family boat and not a first mate. Though we are not perfect and our marriage isn't perfect, it is perfect for us and exactly what I need and want.

I can look back to times when I was going through my rocky relationship with my ex-husband where I asked God, "Why am I going through this and what am I doing wrong?" Little did I know that God was preparing me to meet Jonny. OK he didn't necessarily want me to marry Mr. Wrong, that was my idea. However, it gave me the idea to move to California when I was divorced and lo and behold that is where Jonny decided to move to from Northern Ireland. Also, since I needed to learn what a good relationship looked like (since obviously I had no clue) he put people in my life like my step-sister and step-mother to help me.

The long and short of it is that God works to get us back on the right track. We may elongate the journey if we make bad choices but as we try to follow him he will lead us back to where we need to be. He's also working to get us to the place where our lives will cross the paths of others. And, it is all done at the time frame in which it needs done.

Fast forward to now, I see that what I am going through is preparing me to have the family and children I am destined to have. When I am going through a tough patch, it is really hard to see that. I have a really hard time remembering this and being patient. I have to learn to just trust in God that things are going the way they are supposed to go and not try to push my will on a situation. My impatience can make the journey longer.